


hemorrhoid

by cyberbullystar, kyman420



Series: The Clapverse [3]
Category: South Park
Genre: I cried writing this, M/M, hemorrhoids, sequel to stereotypes
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-05-04
Updated: 2019-05-04
Packaged: 2020-02-18 14:51:26
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 311
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18701800
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/cyberbullystar/pseuds/cyberbullystar, https://archiveofourown.org/users/kyman420/pseuds/kyman420
Summary: Kyle finally gets to exhale.





	hemorrhoid

**Author's Note:**

> i reference Exhale three times in this story, but i wouldn't except kyman420 to know that because they are not, in any way, a sabrina carpenter stannie.

“Kenny,” Kyle said, his glittering emerald green eyes filling with tears. “There’s something wrong with my ass and I—“

“What’s wrong?” Kenny asked. His voice came out unmuffled because everyone likes to draw him without his hood.

Kyle took Kenny’s hands and winced as he sat down. Kenny didn’t even have to ask — the clap of Kyle’s soft ass cheeks said it all. It wasn’t a clap this time. It was more of a bumpy sound.

The sound caused Kenny to wince too.

“I have a hemorrhoid,” Kyle said tearfully. He shifted, and his ass made the bumping sound again. It sounded like when you drive over a pothole.

Kenny was silent.

“Kenny…I asked God if I could sit down for a second…and this is what I get…” Kyle’s ass continued to bump clap at the slightest bit of movement. “Kenny, I just walked away from Stan. Is this why this is happening to me?”

Kenny pulled Kyle towards to him. “Kyle, I will always love you and your ass no matter what happens. Even if it never claps again. Your ass is perfect. And I won’t let Stan have it.”

Kenny gave Kyle’s ass a squeeze, and this time Kyle didn’t move away. He gave in to it.

“I just want to breathe. For just one second, Kenny?”

_I can relate_ , Kenny thought. It’s what he wanted to say. He was about to open his mouth to give Kyle a whole Mysterion speech when Kyle stood up.

There was no painful bumping sound. Kyle smiled at Kenny.

“I think my hemorrhoid is gone.”

Kenny smiled back at Kyle, even if he would never understand.

“And I’m so lucky that ass belongs to me.”

Kyle took Kenny’s hand. “Come on Kenny, Mr. Hankey invited us for bacon and ham.”

They walked off, the sound Kyle’s ass clapping accompanying them.

**Author's Note:**

> I made a playlist for this story, check it out here! https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLJizz0PUrrNBeMKkmHjxif_NFxg83hj15


End file.
